When you have a desire, you are at a crossroads

Every now and again I feel like my awareness and understanding of Law of Attraction expands in a really noticeable way. In a way that has an immediate and practical application in my life.

That’s one of the reasons I think my love affair with LoA continues. There is always more to learn, to know, and then there are these moments where I “get it” in a new way because I’m truly living it.

Perhaps you’ve had that same experience.

You can know and know and know, but it’s when you start living it—whatever the LoA principle is—it’s when you start actually living it, practically applying it in your daily life—that’s when the clouds part and the sun shines and there’s just this amazing feeling of Oh, so that’s how it works.

I had a recent example of this I want to share. And it has to do with the LoA concept of wanted and unwanted. Of every subject really being two subjects—what you want and what you don’t want.

This is not a new concept for me. It’s one that’s been on my radar since my very early days of rediscovering Law of Attraction.

In fact, one of my all-time favorite Abraham quotes is this:

“Every subject is really two subjects, with what is wanted on one end of the stick, and the absence of what is wanted on the other end. Sometimes you are a perfect vibrational match to the unwanted end of the stick but you don’t realize it because it feels normal to you. And that is only because it is more usual for you to talk about the problem rather than the solution.” —Abraham

I love the stick analogy because it makes it so easy to understand what’s going on.

This idea that every subject—finances, health, your relationship, etc—every subject is really two subjects. And you are always activating one end of the stick or the other—depending on what your focus is.

Think of it this way: You’re out walking and you pick up a stick. You can’t pick up that stick without picking up both ends.

In LoA terms, on one end of that stick is wanted and on the other end is unwanted. Both ends exist. Wanted and unwanted always co-exist. The question is: Which will you activate with your thoughts, your focus, your attention?

The stick analogy has helped so many of my clients understand what they are a vibrational match to—what is wanted or what is unwanted.

Back to my recent example of a practical application for an LoA concept.

“Once you’ve decided that you want something, the opposite of it is going to be very much a part of your awareness too.” —Abraham

That’s the concept. That’s it! It’s not fancy. Perhaps doesn’t feel all that earth shattering.

OK, yeah, when you want something new, have some new rocket of desire you’ve launched, you’ll also become more aware of the opposite—as in the absence of what you want. Becoming aware of the opposite can show up as thoughts like: I don’t have it. Where is it? What if I don’t get it?

Recently I launched a rocket of desire, and I did immediately become very aware of the opposite of what I wanted. Very aware.

And when you are very aware of the opposite of what you want, that means the opposite is vibrationally active. That means the opposite—as in the opposite of what I want, as in unwanted—is vibrationally active and attracting.

This is not good for manifesting.

It’s at the very moment when you have a desire that you are at a crossroads. Will you focus on what you want? Or will you focus on the lack or absence of what you want?

Because that choice of focus is going to be all-important as to what comes next. To what you attract, what you create.

If I don’t have a desire for ice cream, I’m not noticing the plethora or the dearth of open ice cream parlors in December.

I could walk by a dozen places, open, not open, and I wouldn’t even really notice. Because until I have the desire—I really want an ice cream cone or I’m really trying to avoid the temptation of ice cream—it’s only when I launch that desire that the opposite will become very much a part of my awareness.

If I’m wanting an ice cream cone, I’m now noticing that every ice cream shop seems to be closed in December. In other words, the opposite of my desire is going to be very much a part of my awareness.

On the other hand, if I’m trying to avoid eating ice cream and don’t want to be tempted—so that’s my desire—now I’m noticing the opposite: It would seem there is an ice cream parlor on every corner and they are all open and offering specials.

While my ice cream example might seem silly, imagine the vibrational consequences as this plays out for all your desires.

Every single time you launch a rocket of desire, the lack or absence of what you want is now part of your awareness as well.

So here’s what was going on for me.

Over the past several weeks I’ve felt some stirrings, some questions really, about what’s next for me work-wise. About my podcast. About coaching. About what I want to create next—or not.

The stirrings and questions launched a rocket of desire for me that was about clarity.

I don’t have a particular goal in mind or something I’m wanting to achieve. I simply want clarity.

Well, clarity is a desire. Perhaps not the kind of desire where you can go to the store and hand over your credit card to make a purchase, but clarity is very much a desire.

And the moment I launched a rocket of desire for clarity about my work, was the exact moment the opposite because very much a part of my awareness too.

The opposite as in confusion. Right? Confusion is the opposite of clarity.

So I have a desire for clarity, and the opposite—confusion—is now seemingly everywhere. Suddenly there were even more questions without answers. More—well, it could be this or it could be that or I could do this thing or stop doing that thing…but I don’t know because I don’t have clarity.

Now, this isn’t a bad thing. All this confusion. And it’s not unexpected. It doesn’t mean anything has gone wrong. It doesn’t mean I need to force to figure things out or effort with a bunch of action.

The appearance of confusion on the scene is simply how Law of Attraction works.

“For every pleasing thing, there is an unpleasing counterpart, for within every particle of the Universe is that which is wanted as well as the lack of that which is wanted.” —Abraham

The only reason I’m noticing the confusion is because I have a desire for clarity. Now, this doesn’t mean my desire for clarity is a bad thing. It doesn’t mean I should stop wanting what I want.

What’s going on here is simply the path to manifesting. When you have a desire, you will then become aware of the lack or absence of what you want.

I had a desire for clarity. I immediately became aware of the lack of clarity, the absence of clarity.

And so given that this is how Law of Attraction, what are you to do?

Well, here’s the key: Focus.

Intentional focus. Choosing focus. Stay focused on what is wanted rather than on unwanted.

In my case, as the confusion came in, came to my awareness…as I had more and more questions to which I did not have the answers…I chose to stay focused.

I want clarity, so I will look for clarity. I will celebrate any form or flavor of clarity. I will notice where there is clarity, no matter how small or seemingly insignificant, and I will bask in it.

I will stay on the side of what is wanted with my thoughts. I will not entertain confused thoughts. I will not continue to repeatedly ask a question for which I don’t have the answer. I will not linger in confusion and create momentum in that direction.

Instead, I will tune the confusion out of my frequency.

“It is not your job to get rid of unwanted. It is your job to tune it out of your frequency.” —Abraham

So it’s not my job to get rid of all confusion. The world doesn’t need to be a place where there is no confusion.

I simply have to tune it out of my frequency. Which can easily be done by staying on the side of clarity.

I can be clear that I want clarity! I can be appreciative for any clarity I do have. I can ask questions with curiosity, trusting the Universe to unfold and reveal, without activating the unwanted of confusion.

One of my clients shared her experience of this LoA concept.

She and her partner had been long-time renters and had never really had any other desire. Then they moved to a different part of the country, and for the first time had the desire to buy a home.

As soon as they had this desire, the couple started hearing all these stories about the difficulty of finding a house, how lengthy the process would be, how much they would need to compromise. They started noticing all these homes outside their desired price range.

Their overarching desire is to find a home easily that they love and feel good about purchasing, and to enjoy the process. To have fun on the journey to being home owners.

Again, the LoA principle holds true: “Once you’ve decided that you want something, the opposite of it is going to be very much a part of your awareness too.” —Abraham

My client and her partner had a choice to make. They can’t shield themselves from this truth about the opposite of their desire coming into their awareness. But they can choose their focus. They can be intentional about what they expect.

“Expectation is a focus with a vibration that permits the receiving of what you’re focused upon. And you expect things—both wanted and unwanted.” —Abraham

And so will they expect a fun and easy home buying journey? In other words, expect what is wanted. Or will they expect an arduous and exacting experience as they try to buy a home?

The practical application of all this for me is two-fold.

First, it’s very reassuring to realize that whenever I have a desire, the opposite is going to be part of my awareness too.

I find the predictability and inevitability of that to be reassuring. I know it’s going to happen, so no need to think the sky is falling or I’m not doing LoA right, or that I need to effort my way to get what I want.

So that’s the first practical application: I know what to expect when I have a new desire.

Second, I really embrace that with every desire I’m at the crossroads. Wanted—that way. Unwanted—the other way.

And I will go down one of those paths depending upon my focus. Depending on the thoughts I choose to think and what I give my attention to.

 “When you focus upon an unwanted aspect of something in an effort to push it away from you, it only comes closer, because you get what you give your attention to whether it is something that you want or not. It is up to you to focus upon and attract what is wanted.” —Abraham

It is up to you, when you have a desire, to be easy—relaxed even—about the awareness of the opposite. And then to choose to activate what it is wanted.

“If you focus upon whatever you want, you will attract whatever you want. If you focus upon the lack of whatever you want, you will attract more of the lack.” —Abraham

Why a bad mood is bad for manifesting

I came across a Neville Goddard quote the other day that’s been percolating in my mind ever since: “Be careful of your moods and feelings, for there is an unbroken connection between your feelings and your visible world.” —Neville Goddard Now, I don’t usually gravitate toward anything in the realm of “be careful of…” because […]

Continued...

Being controlling simply doesn’t feel good

The other day a client shared how frustrated she is that her spouse won’t take her advice about how to handle a situation at work. Her spouse keeps talking about and worrying about the situation, and my client keeps offering advice and directives, usually preceded by, Here’s what you should do… And yet the situation […]

Continued...

Do you have a hard time delegating?

Let’s start with this juicy question: Are you wearing struggle like a badge of honor? Oh my goodness! The pre-LoA version of me absolutely wore struggle like a badge of honor. Efforting and striving were my MO. I had struggle and success all mixed together, as if you couldn’t have the success without the struggle. […]

Continued...